Hello, my name is Adrian and I suffer from the guilt of not forwarding 50 million frigging chain letters sent to me by people who actually believe that if you send them on, a poor 6-year-old girl in some forgotten corner of the world with a breast on her forehead will be able to raise enough money to have it removed before her dumb arse parents sell her to a traveling freak show or, the good-luck fairy will bestow upon me my greatest wish but only if I send it onto another 10 people within 10 minutes otherwise it's bad luck for the rest of my life or, I will find love within 7 days if i forward them or else I will be doomed with misfortune!
Give me a break!
Do you honestly believe that Bill Gates is going to give you, and everyone to whom you send "his" email, $1000???How stupid are we?
"Ooooh, looky here! If I scroll down this page and make a wish, I'll get laid by a supermodel I just happen to run into the next day!"
What a bunch of Bullshit!
Hey?, Maybe the evil chain letter dwarfs will come into my house and sodomize me in my sleep for not continuing a chain letter that was started by Saint Peter in 50 AD?Piss off!
If you're going to forward something, at least send me something mildly amusing. I've seen all the "send this to 10 of your closest friends", and this poor, wretched excuse for a human being will somehow receive a nickel from some omniscient being who forwards about 900 times. Or you will receive some miracle within the next day?
I really don't friggin fucking bloody care.
Show a little intelligence and think about what you're actually contributing to by sending out these forwards. Chances are, it's your own unpopularity.
The point being? If you get some chain letter that's threatening to leave you shagless or luckless for the rest of your life, delete it. If it's funny, send it on.
Don't piss people like me off by trying to make us feel guilty about a toothless, penis'less leper in Botswana who has been tied to the ass of a dead elephant for 27 years and whose only salvation is the 5 cents per letter he'll receive if we forward this email.
Now forward this to everyone you know.Otherwise, tomorrow morning your underwear will turn carnivorous and will consume your genitals.
Have a nice day.
P.S. Send me 10 bucks